Sunday, April 22, 2007

Cabbie No More

The time has finally come for me to walk away from that big yellow swordfish one last time and turn in my key, head held high, thankful for life and sanity. My cool new job at the Scientology Center is such that I no longer need to spend my weekends in the fishbowl, driving for my supper. Hallelujah! It was often fun and interesting, but it was also a petri dish full of stressful events. I will live longer now. Bye, bye, SUV queens who can't see above the steering wheel. Bye, bye, stop-sign-running bike nazis. Bye, bye, demolition-derby bus drivers. Bye, bye, miffed one-night-stand people who'd convinced themselves they were THE ONE, slinking home to sleep it off, too self-absorbed to tip. Bye, bye, smug Marina pod-people, flush with "success".
Bye, bye, cold-blooded cabbies who steal your fares. And, buh-bye, Exxon, Shell, etc. If anyone could squeeze blood out of a turnip, it's decidedly you. Let me know when we can get 100 MPG, and maybe I'll drive again.

Meanwhile, let's see what's going on out there:

Here's a science minister saying that elderly people should be tagged with implants. I take it that minister is not himself in the autumn of his life, as I don't see him volunteering to be the first one tagged. And, here are some people who say that no one should be chipped. I say, chip the control freaks, and keep them down on the farm. They've caused enough trouble already.

It seems that a language arts-teaching parrot has been discovered. Is THIS how our president learned to speak? It would figure, and, boy, making sense in this world is a mighty arduous task. If there is anyone truly up to it, I'd like to know about it.


Blogger John said...

DC cabby going going,New York hack...Going.

3:05 PM  
Blogger Pissedoffcabbie said...

I'll still be here, I just won't be behind the wheel of a Ford Crown Victoria any more.

9:52 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Scientology Center? Is that a joke? You work for a cult?

7:17 PM  
Blogger Pissedoffcabbie said...

I'd like to go into a Scientology center with a dozen people in gorilla suits, and knock everything over and tear shit up. Any takers?

7:46 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Will you start being nice to SF bicyclists now?

2:22 PM  
Blogger Pissedoffcabbie said...

Nice to SF bicyclists? You mean, like slamming on my brakes and wearing my coffee when a cyclist runs a stop sign in front of me?


2:43 PM  

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